What exactly is choice?

I received the following email today from a friend:

FOCA would establish the right to abortion as a fundamental right (like the right to free speech) and wipe away every restriction on abortion nationwide. It will allow all types of abortions including partial birth abortions, also allowing babies who are born alive due to botched up late term abortions to be set aside without any medical care or nourishment and left to die. They are murdered in the most cruel and inhuman way. This Bill will also make it mandatory for doctors and nurses to perform this act even if they do not want to do so. This act also allows under age teens to have an abortion, even partial birth abortions, without parental consent.
It will eradicate state and federal abortion laws that the majority of Americans support and prevent states from enacting similar protective measures in the future.
Please let your family and friends know about this Bill and ask them to also sign this petition. Even those who voted for Obama would not want him to sign this Bill. Please click on the web site below. It will take less than a minute of your time, doesn't cost anything and God will bless you for standing up for Him and His teachings.
Please read the expert analysis by Americans United for Life (AUL) and sign the Fight FOCA petition at:http://www.fightfoca.com/
"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is that good people do nothing"

What do you think? Do you think choice should start before conception or is there still time to decide once a baby is on the way? This is a tough issue. Where do you stand?

"My life is boring..." and other things I've come to terms with.

"My Life is Boring."
Yesterday, my head was spinning. I was trying to think of something fun that Missy and I could do. Maybe we could go to the park or the library. Then reality set in. I don't have the car but I do have a messy house. No fun for us. As I thought about the things I desperately needed to get done like the laundry and scrub the bathroom I realized that these chores are what make up a big part of my life. This lightbulb moment was weird. I finally accepted the fact that my life is boring and felt content about it. I do enjoy a clean house but I think I've fought it during this past year. I couldn't accept that cleaning was my major job. I wanted to do other things. Now though, I'm happy when I think of myself as a cleaner. I can do this.

"I Could Have a Boy."
Two days in a row at the park I witnessed boys playing with swords and shields and I literally shuttered. "I don't know if I'm up for that" I thought. Then a sweet peace came over me when I realized that the Lord will give me what I can handle. I told this to my husband that night over dinner and he commented that that could mean having a boy. I told him I knew that, but that my boy could be sweet (disclaimer: boys who play with swords are sweet, I'm talking in big generalities here.) Then my darling husband replied in a voice so gentle and sincere, "Of course he'll be sweet, because that is how he'll be treated." I told him that was the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me. Today we went to the park and My Hero ran around with our adorable neighbor boy. Once I could see it and imagine more clearly I realized that having a boy would be so wonderful. My Hero looked awfully cute with a little sidekick.

"I'm Experiencing a Conflict of Interest"
This week hasn't been my best. My "nesting" instinct is in full force and all I want to do is get my house sparkly, but my best intentions are being thwarted by that silly need to get lots of rest in the first trimester. Not only does my body crave more sleep, the thought of being unconscious is more appealing than being awake with that incessant nausea. I feel really bad when I know I can get much more done, but my bed is calling me. So I let it go, I don't finish everything I should, but I love being a happy mommy. I hate Grouchy Mommy Syndrome.

"Let it go, Amy, let it go."
I've been telling myself this lately. I'm trying to not let things bother me. I had to work a little extra hard today. An unexpected doorbell ring came this morning. I nervously went to the door wondering who it could be. I was delighted to look through the peep-hole and recognize the man in uniform was from the Orkin pest control company. I swung open the door, flashed a big smile and said, "Hi! How are you?" You see, I've had ant trouble for the past week and needed his help desperately. Maybe he was caught off guard by my exuberance or friendliness. The next thing out of his mouth was, "Have we met before?" "Ummm....no I don't think so." I mumbled, thinking this wasn't the type of professional conversation I was expecting. I didn't want him to feel uncomfortable so I probably stammered a little bit more. He solved the confusion by thoughtfully saying, "Oh, you housewives all look alike." I wish I had a picture of my expression. Jaw dropped, gasping for air, shocked at being summed up and called a housewife? I never thought of myself that way. While we talked business about the ants I kept telling myself, "Let it go, Amy, let it go." Ohhh, how I struggled. Good thing My Hero had the day off because I immediately reported the offense, laughed a little, and realized that I can't help what other people say but I can quickly forgive and not build up a wall.

"Extreme Emotions"
Nothing makes me happier than the opening credits of "The Office" and nothing makes me more sad than the end.

So there you have it. 5 simple things I'm learning along the way. What have you accepted and come to terms with lately?

A new year, a new me.

As I think about ALL the things I'd like to do differently this year, a few really jump out. My initial New Year's resolutions are to keep up on the housework, cook healthier meals and scrapbook my blog before February. Ok, that is a good plan...but what can I work on in between all of that? Plenty. But for starters I'd like to give myself the gift of the present. Yes, you read that right. I would like to live more of my life in the present. I love to daydream but I don't want to dream my life away. This year brings lots of changes; two moves and a baby. What is challenging for me right now is not knowing where we are moving and not knowing the gender of the baby. ARGH! I can't sit still. So to live in the present here is what I will do. Enjoy every single moment I have with blue skies, pine trees and ocean. Also, enjoy my body the way it is right now and be glad that I'm 7 months away from a huge belly, recovering from labor, and more sleepless nights than we already have. Life is always going to be fun and hard. The trick for me is to enjoy all of it while it happens and wait for what is next.

What about you? What are your biggest goals for 2009?

P.S. Ok so I was just reading a blog that had a great idea. Enough of resolutions. What do you do well as a parent? What do you pat yourself on the back for? Go ahead...be honest...remember all the things you are awesome at this year!!

In the Strangers' Defense

I ventured out into the world again and ran into three strangers that cancelled out yesterday's experience. The lady at the checkout and the woman behind us kept calling Missy "Beautiful Girl." On the way out I put her in the big part of the shopping cart (the part you are not supposed to unless that is the only way to manage a cart and a toddler) and a man asked, "Which aisle did you find her?" I thought it was cute, but didn't quite know what to say in return. I mumbled something about being 50% off. That was on my mind since that was how much Missy's Christmas present was discounted. Then he came back with, "Does she have a 30-day money back guarantee?" This reply was easy. "Nope. I get to keep her forever." He agreed and it was a warm-hearted exchange. He even ended our impromptu conversation with, "Take care." So there you have it. I was totally disgruntled yesterday about going into public, and today was thrilled. Just goes to show that some strangers can be slightly offensive, while others are sincere and kind.

Rude?

I ventured out into the world today. I went to go pick up Missy's pictures we had taken a few weeks ago. After picking up the pictures and being offered a few extras for such a low price (sheesh) the woman at the portrait studio started to chit-chat. We were talking about Hawaii and how I shouldn't go there because I am "very white." Oh, thank you. While leaving the mall, I tried to be thoughtful and considerate of someone else. I hustled a few paces to help a woman with a stroller through a door. The woman (who didn't say thank-you, BTW) asked why Missy was in such a hurry. "Is it because you are going to go eat something?" she asked. I said "No, she just wants to see the baby." The lady replied, "Oh, he is no baby. He is going to be one year on Dec. 26." "Oh!" I replied, "Her birthday is the 31st." She responded, "She is so small, will she be one?" "No, two." I say over my shoulder as I'm walking away. Meanwhile the woman's face has this most shocked look. Jaw dropped, eyes all big, and just standing there. Yeah, thanks. I really needed your opinion today.

Why is it that children are under such scrutiny? "She's tall, he's big, she's cute, he's short blah, blah, blah." We talk about them like they are not even there. And furthermore, everything is such a judgement. Why can't we just say, "How old is he? Ohhh....children sure are wonderful. It was nice to meet you." Instead of offering evaluation/judgment/advice.

What about you? What's the worst thing a stranger has ever said to you? Do you brush it off or does it bug you?

P.S. In regards to my last post...I ran into a blog that was talking about the very issue of spanking. It talked about how Christians believe in spanking because that is what the Bible tells them to do. This person's comment shed new light on the subject: "As far as the “rod” Bible verse goes… From what I’ve read, in context the translation of “rod” from the Hebrew refers to a shepard’s staff. That would make sense, right? A rod isn’t used to beat the sheep, it’s used to firmly guide them on the correct path."

Here's for a good laugh!

*Thanks for sounding off about phones! I enjoyed reading every one's perspective.*

I just got my new book in the mail, "Mothering and Fathering: The gender Differences in Child Rearing." In light of all the same-gender marriage opinions I wanted to better understand why having a mother and a father is in the best interest of a child. I read a review of the book and thought it would enlarge my understanding, as well as help me understand the different approaches between My Hero and I. You can find a link to this book on my shelfari bookcase.

I eagerly opened it today and have enjoyed it so far. The author's main thesis is that most child-rearing is done by a mother (female perspective) while most advice is written by experts and doctors (male perspective). She argues that both perspectives are important and that the mother should not push away her motherly instincts in favor of a supposed expert. In it, the author Tine Thevenin, cites quotes from men from the early ages.

The first is from the book of Proverbs. Her version says, "The rod and reproof give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother." What?! The bible talks about whipping a child? I can't believe this. Sure enough I opened up to the King James version of the book of proverbs and found this "Withold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell" (Proverbs 23:13-14).

If your parenting philosophy includes spankings, then this scripture will bring you comfort and validation. If you don't believe in spanking you may take solace that Proverbs is in the "old Testament." Jesus Christ brings to light many new teachings in the "new Testament" such as "And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you" (Eph 4:32).

The next quote is from Aelfric (c. 1000) an Anglo-Saxon monk and writer. He said, "As he spared his rod, he hated his child."

The third and final quote that really gave me a good laugh, mostly because I found myself nodding in agreement with the idea of validating a child's feeling and "mourning with those that mourn" (Mosiah 18:9) and then was completely slapped in the face. It is by Maffeo Vegio a Fifteenth-century Florentine poet. "Mothers say 'no' to no request. They let [their children] have their way; they take their side when they complain about the hurts of their playmates or the blows of their teachers, just as if...they themselves were injured. Finally, they allow them complete license for whatever they want....What could be more monstrous than this easy and permissive education, which mothers in particular are wont to follow?"

So there you have it. The man's view of child-rearing throughout the years. Whatever your philosophy, take to heart the next time someone offers advice (male or female) that doesn't ring true for you, that it is just advice. After all, you are a mother and the Lord has given you characteristics and abilities that will benefit your children.

When you disagree with your spouse over parenting issues does it just aggravate you or ultimately work out for the benefit of all? What are the benefits you've seen in your family (past or present) by having a mother and a father.

Does this suit you?

I just learned about this new phone on Momformation. It helps you manage your time and activities. It's a phone, planner, checks email and plays music.

What I'm wondering is how long it would take to type in all that information on the tiny keys. What's wrong with a free calendar on the wall and *hopefully* a pen nearby? Are planners and notebooks a thing of the past? My Hero and I recently were talking about how technology (at least the Internet) can be total time-zappers.

What do you think? Would this new phone waste more time or help simplify life? Would it become a distraction or bring order to a busy life?