Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Opposites Attract

Ideally, I will post to this blog on Friday afternoons, but because of impending holidays, I'll post today. Enjoy...

Whenever I hear a joke about men and women being different I laugh along. But really, I have a hard time pin-pointing a specific difference between my husband and I that illicits feelings of frustration and angst. Not that it doesn't happen, I just don't think about it out of context. Until now.

I have observed on many occassions, that I like to brainstorm and think things through very carefully. I have to spend time with an idea or decision so I can think of every possibility and be certain that I am happy with my choice. My Hero likes to make a decision once he is given the options. To me, that is too late.

For example, if I am about to call friends to make plans I like to have all of my ideas/suggestions/times in place. I do this because once I'm on the phone and start coming up with a plan, I tend to go with whatever the other person suggests. Then once I hang up, I am miserable because I didn't insert my opinion. When I ask my husband, on the other hand, for his ideas/suggestions/times...he says, "Let's just call and see what they want" or something along those lines. NO! NO! NO! What's the point? When people come together to make a plan, everyone needs to have a say.

Perhaps this is just an illustration of my stressed-out, zany personality as opposed to his go-with-the-flow, chillaxed view. Yes, I did just say chillaxed. I'm hip. Whatever it is, it makes us different.

I can't help but wonder though, if it will work in my favor for extremely important decisions, like baby names. I start thinking of names long before I ever conceive. It is a tremendous responsiblity to give a human being a combination of consonants, vowels and a number of syllables that other people use to call their attention. Who wants to be called, "Blah" or "Plish" or "Gaaaaaaaaaa"? Nobody! It has to be beautiful, not bland.

When I bring up the topic, I watch as his eyes glaze over. In his mind, it is pointless to think about names if there isn't even a baby on the way. Once there is, in Missy's case, he doesn't want to waste time until we know the gender. Ok, It's a Girl! Maybe we should wait until we see her. UGH! The last thing I want to do in the hospital is pick a NAME.

If we are blessed with another baby, I've already devised a Word document entitled, "Names I like." It's on our desktop and I've already made him aware of it. When it is late at night and I can't sleep, I go on babycenter and look through their lists of names. If something jumps out I put it on my list. When I look at the clock and notice it is 2 am, I have to wonder if what I'm doing serves any purpose.

Here's the advantage. If I take the time to start thinking/wishing/dreaming/evaluating/editing baby names, long before there is ever a baby, I feel like I'm ready to fight for my favorites. Hmmm...maybe fight isn't the best thing I should do. It is after all a joint decision, but I must have a clear idea about my preference. Besides, I'm the one that is going to be hollering the name, My Hero will just be over there playing and laughing.

What about you? Do you think about names in advance or do you ask the nurse for a baby name book? How do you choose a name? Be sure to sound-off and/or visit my poll to the right.

7 comments:

Kara and Chant said...

I always thought about baby names before I was even pregnant. By the time I was a few months along I had a lengthy list. Just before the ultrasound to see what the baby was, we had the list down to one boy name and one girl name. As soon as we found out if it was a boy or a girl, we had a name and started calling the baby by it. I loved knowing what my baby's name would be. It was so fun when Brinnley could say "Ainsy" when she was born and when the girls know Porter's name long before he was born. I think you are so cute for looking up names in the middle of the night. You are right, a name is an important decision and one that deserves a lot of thought.

Erin said...

We have gotten all of our names from the scriptures and then use a family name for their middle name. So far it's been good but we decide before we even know the gender. We hope to have at least one more and James wants a boy so he already has the name picked out...if it's a girl...who knows!

Emily said...

Ah, yes, naming Baby. See, in our house, it is very different. My husband has chosen ALL of our kids' names. Even though I don't always initially agree, I have come around to all of them. I dread naming kids. I remember thinking, especially with my first, is it really okay for me to just choose ANY name for this little person? I mean, it isn't like they are a pet or something like that; babies will grow up to be adults. Okay, so I guess this comment is getting long, too. And maybe kind of scatterbrained, but hey, I am a mom. Have fun putting a list of names together; it's creative. And don't worry, because you are right on the button with little Missy! She fits her name like a glove! Cute blog! I will be back!

Amy said...

Love your comments ladies!

Kara - I agree, knowing the name is a great way to bond.

Erin - I love your kids' names. Beautiful and original.

Emily - I know Dallas had a big say in your girls' names but didn't you pick Gabe's by yourself?

Erin said...

Yes, naming kids. I find this very stressful. It is a big thing to me as well to have to give this little person a name they will have for life. Before I got married I had a few girl/boy names I liked. But since then all the names I ever considered were either taken or something made me not like them anymore. So, I really don't have a list of names anymore. Wayne and I usually have very different ideas on names. He's the same was as Your Hero, he doesn't like talking about baby names and thinks it's silly to think of names for a child that doesn't exist yet. And he also won't start thinking of a name until we know the gender as well because he thinks there is no sense in thinking of a name for a gender we won't be having. That can be frustrating because I think as women we like to plan these things out and they just don't cooperate! :) So, I'm not sure where I"m going with all this. I guess just to say my husband is the same and I think it's fun and good to have these things planned out. It definitely helps. I'm definitely at a loss for any names for any future children. Maybe I better start making a list just incase! Oh, as far as your poll, a couple of the options fit what we do. We like to use family names and also have them be unique. So, that has kinda been our pattern. Anyways, have a great Thanksgiving this week!

lancer said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Emily said...

Nope, Dallas picked it. But, I must say, it is a GREAT name! I wouldn't let Dallas pick the names if they were bad. Dallas just has impeccable taste in names!